Friday, April 29, 2011

CBWR? Chapter 65

Authors’ notes:
This chapter is all the fault of your twitter people encouraging me to do stuff I shouldn’t.  You know who you are.  It probably ought to have been beta’d.  I’ll fix it tomorrow.
 I knew it wasn’t right.
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Chapter 65:
Bella was still pretty groggy when we got to Paris.  I half walked/half carried her into the lobby and sat her down in an overstuffed chair while I checked in.  The hotel I had chosen was just down the street from the Eiffel Tower.  I remembered how she had looked at it when we were here before, and I asked for a room with a good view of it.  At first, the lady at the desk tried to discourage me – those rooms were expensive.  Once I set her straight on that deal by handing her my shiny black credit card, we got the pick of the entire hotel.
When we walked into the room, Bella was instantly awake.
The hotel had an odd, triangular shape to it – very modern for the rest of the area we were in.  Our room was on one on the angles, and as you walked in, the suite doors opened into the bedroom, which was two whole walls of glass, meeting at an angle on the far side.  The bed was in the center, and the lights of Paris were shining through the windows and making the whole room glow with light.
The view of the tower was nothing short of spectacular.
Bella went to the window and looked out at the giant landmark with the light from the setting sun making it glow in the distance.  I ran my hand through my hair and just watched her as she marveled over it.  She turned back to me and her eyes were glowing.  My heart started to beat faster, which was really starting to make me wonder if I didn’t need a complete physical once all this was over.
“It’s beautiful,” Bella said.  She walked back over to me and tossed her arms casually around my neck.  It felt…weird.  Good weird.  Like they were supposed to be there, but since nothing else was ever supposed to be there before…well, I didn’t understand it, but I liked it.
I put my arms around her waist and gave me a half smile.  I tried not to focus on her lips too much, though I really did want to kiss her again.  I was also kind of wondering if she hadn’t wised up on the trip over here, and would maybe tell me she didn’t want anything to do with me anymore.
Actually, I kind of waited for her to tell me that about every thirty seconds or so. 
Maybe she wouldn’t say anything.   Maybe I’d just come back from getting ice or something and she just wouldn’t be here anymore.  For some reason, I remembered my mother fiddling around with the rabbit ears on top of the television in the trailer the day I went to school in the morning, and when I came back that afternoon she gone.  She didn’t say anything to me as I got my book bag and walked to the bus stop, but I remembered her yelling at the TV.  It was the last time I saw her.
“Why do you look so sad?” Bella suddenly asked. 
“I’m not,” I replied.
“What were you thinking about?”
“Um…my mom, I guess,” I said with a shrug.
“What about her?”
“Nothing, really.”
That answer apparently wasn’t good enough, because she kept on me until I told her more.
“I was just thinking about the day they left,” I finally admitted.
“Why?” Bella asked.  “What did she say?”
“Nothing,” I told her.  “She was trying to get the TV to work.  She didn’t say anything to me.”
“Did you ever see her again?”  Bella’s eyes had narrowed and her brow was all furrowed up.  She looked like she was upset, and I didn’t want her feeling that way.  Not about me.  It just wasn’t worth it.
“I didn’t have to share the TV all afternoon,” I said with a smile.  Bella did not return the smile, but instead, her hand reached up and brushed over my cheek.
“There was something wrong with her, Edward,” Bella said softly.  “Not you.  You were just a kid.  Moms aren’t’ supposed to be like that.”
I didn’t know what to say to that, so I didn’t say anything.  I never really noticed anything wrong with her.  It was just a shit situation – we didn’t have any money or anything, so she did what she could, I guess.   That’s why I started running guns in the first place – the money was fucking incredible.  It still was.
I kind of wondered if I had gotten a job before they left and brought in some money…well...maybe they wouldn’t have gone.
Bella’s eyes dropped down to my lips, and a moment later she had risen up on her toes to reach me.  I let her tongue run over mine as my hand ran up her back, holding her close to me.  We stood there for a moment, just kissing gently and holding each other.  It was strange, like Bella throwing her arms around me was strange.  I had just never done something like this – just kissed.  I never would have even considered it before.
Before her.
Her arms slid down to my shoulders and she pulled at me until her she sat back on the bed.  She looked up at me and smiled the most incredible smile I had ever seen.  It was beautiful, and sexy, and lovely, and just…just…joyous.
I crawled into the bed after her, crawling up her body as she lay backwards on the bed.  My mouth found hers again, and she tangled her fingers in my hair and pulled me close to her. 
I knew it wasn’t right.
I knew it wasn’t good.
But I really, really wanted it, right?
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Chapter end notes:
Thanks to all the tweet peeps who reminded me the word I wanted was LANDMARK.  I appreciate that.
Why does Edward in this always make me think of the Nine Inch Nails Song “Kinda I Want To”?

76 comments:

  1. Landmark! That was funny tonight. I hate when I am so tired that I can't think. Little things, you know, like the kids' names.

    When you get dragged back to work on a Friday night, we get a couple of extra chapters. I really want to feel guilty, but golly, I am loving CBWR? so much that guilt is the last thing I feel.

    Speaking of guilty, if he goes ahead with the smexin, what will Alice and Rosalie do to him?

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  2. I can totally see why that Nine song reminds you of Doofy.

    And OMG that hotel sounds amazing. Although the glass walls...don't sound safe when you have peeps after your ass. But what do I know?

    Loved the kissing and continue to love on Edward's confusion and lack of comprehension of what he is feeling. When it hits him it is going to be sadly epic.

    Thank you for ANOTHER update today.

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  3. awwww. thanks for the update. and leaving us hanging again. hahah!!! loving this fic sooo much. thinking that this hotel might just do the trick, but then again, who knows with these two? so interested to see where it ends. what happens with renee and charlie, etc. edward and bella. just can't wait to see!!!

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  4. Fucking hanging gardens of Babylon...

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  5. Awww poor Edward, every time I read about his mother, I want to beat the shit out of her, and hug Edward. Poor thing :(

    I hope he doesn't do anything with Bella right now... well, he can do something, but please not all the way? Not until she's really safe and free.

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  6. Well, if you really, really want...I guess you gotta take it, right?
    I want to just walk behind Doofus and smack him on the back of the head. I'm sure he'll get there, but he sure is taking his sweet time.

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  7. Oh Edward. Just give into what you are feeling. I love it as always.

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  8. Ahhhh another cliffie!!!!! It's funny how she knows him so well, better than he knows himself. The hotel sounds beautiful.

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  9. Do you even know how much you are spoiling us? Wow great chapter, the more we know of Doofy, the worse I feel for him. The worst part is he doesn't know he should feel bad about his childhood. Thanks Savage

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  10. The poor little kid is what Bella sees other than the fuck hot man in frount of her lol

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  11. I think they better have the talk... you know the one... about the future. She must have realized what prompted him to think of his mom and the day she left him, right? I half expected her to say, "I will never leave you, never." But I know it is too soon for that and anyways she couldn't or wouldn't because she wants to go home. How would she ever explain him to her parents? How could she ever explain anything to her parents? Even though they did what had to be done to keep her alive... they still broke the law to do it so in Charlie's eyes they are all deserving of jail time... I guess. Maybe Bella could go home and then meet up with Edward after... like as if she just met him for the first time? That would work wouldn't it? I guess I want them to try to make it. It brought a tear to my eyes when he was thinking of Bella leaving him... and his mom leaving him. Sad.

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  12. Wow your comment section got shnazy... :) Awww that room was super romantic Edward your a fast learner :)))

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  13. if it hadnt been for 'live bookmarks' i wouldnt have known you posted another chapter.


    i am glad i add it.


    :)

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  14. love this story

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  15. This can't possible end well, they are falling in love, but only have a week more to be together? that sucks.

    Loved the chapter

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  16. “There was something wrong with her, Edward,” Bella said softly. “Not you. You were just a kid. Moms aren’t’ supposed to be like that.”
    That brought tears to my eyes...poor Edward. I've loved this story from the start, but I swear I love it a little more with each chapter that posts.

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  17. Ah, now when I hear that NIN song I'll think of Doofy too. :)

    I srsly wondering if he'll really 'go for it' or if he'll just back out again. Really hoping for the former here!

    The setting seems tres romanitc. Doofy, you done good!

    Again, his thoughts about his mom break my heart. And him wondering if he would have started earning $$$ sooner, if they wouldn't have left. *sniff*

    And his innocence about whaIt he's feeling for Bella is very endearing. Sofa king cute.

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  18. i....but...so close..... *hangs head* im gonna twitter stalk you you know that right? nookie please? with a cherry on top.....

    pun intended.

    love it lady i did the happy dance when you described the room.

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  19. Back in Paris. I am still torn

    I wish I was on twitter but I just can't do it. I would be gone from rl.

    Roshambo

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  20. Love, love. love LOVE the way their relationship is progressing.

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  21. she wants him but i fell bad for him. she's going to leave him, and he is so comfortable with her.

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  22. God you are killing me! Get my hopes up and then end the chapter!!! Lol but its okay I like the torture ;)

    Anyways Edward is just so endearing! I can't explain it but you just love him! His poor childhood!

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  23. I think Edward's sub-conscience is cock-blocking him b/c if he realizes that he is feeling different about certain things, and if he "makes love" to Bella and she leaves it will destroy him. Self-preservation, of sorts. Even more than when his Mom left, b/c he likes what she's making him feel. I thought that Bella had told Edward in a previous chapter that she wouldn't leave him. It was so sad to think about a little kid just going to school like any other day and not even realizing that he's been abandoned and neglected. :(

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  24. Go Bella!! Love a girl who demands what she wants (even sweetly)! ;D

    Giggles about NIN. :D

    Ahhh, Paris! Adore the setting! See, his subconscious was taking SOME notes at some point! LOL

    Love that he could just kiss (mostly) and like TVC said!!

    Thanks!!!

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  25. "Maybe just for tonight.
    We can pretend its alright." - this song is just about Edward. He is not only sure that he isn't good for Bella and has no right to be with you, but he doesn't understand why she would want him and supposes that this is Stockholm syndrome or a need to be cared for after her ordeal.

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  26. The only hope is in the well known song's words : "All you need is love, love is all you need..."
    However, I do remember another song : "Love was enough..."

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  27. Bella is making him feel so...good? confused? horny? Hope it keeps going - he likes it!
    Been thinking about this plot line with seriousness (why? I don't know) but I've come to the conclusion that it's not gonna have the HEA I want it to have. I want Edward to end up with Bella, and have the 'happily ever after', but that's a BIG change for him. The only way I could see it happening is if Bella turned to a life of crime for him. (Altho you did give Hide and Drink a happy ending.) But I'll enjoy it no matter which way you go.
    Gotta say, I love all the fequent updates! Keep them coming! thanx!!!
    annah

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  28. I have a really bad feeling all of a sudden that Lee is going to come & snatch Bella & take her back to her parents & Edward will just give her up, that would be so sad.

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  29. Bella wants Edward, Edward wants Bella, he thinks anyway! I can't remember, have they actually had sex together yet? I'm reading to many stories right now. LOL! I need to go back to the beginning and check that out! I think this Lee guy will show up and cause some problems coming up soon! Thanks for the update! I love reading this story!

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  30. Hmmm...the problem is, we know you. You are Queen of the Cockblocks! Nothing will happen for at least another 5 chapters!! LOL.

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  31. Well, that's not fair! The chapters are pretty short...LOL

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  32. You're killing me here...Love that Bella is getting so much stronger....Edward just might get it one of these days, right?
    Thanks
    Carol

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  33. Stop cock blocking! Come on, please. You're killing me, well and Edward and Bella too ;) And good job twitter peeps for whatever you said to Savage.

    Stephanie

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  34. I continue to love him and your words!!!

    Jane

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  35. Hmm, looks like they're finally going to get some consumation going! I mean, how can they not? They're married, they clearly find the other attractive, and they're in an obscenely expensive hotel in the most romantic city in the world, with a fantastic view of one of the world's great phallic symbols .... c'mon, what else are they gonna do?!

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  36. Crossing my fingers and hoping chapter 66 is "the chapter" I just love Edward, he is a little child underneath all that hard exterior. And you Savage are a marvelous writer!

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  37. Getting that room with a view was a good idea, and very thoughtful and romantic - way to go Doofus. I can't wait for Bella's reaction when in the evening at every full hour the Eiffel tower twinkles for a couple of minutes. I bet she will flip.
    Edward's memory of how his mom left was so sad. Bella has her work cut out for her with him.

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  38. Again, Bella sees Edward in a way he doesn't see himself. Also, he actually did the romantic-couple thing by getting the room with the view and remembering that it was special to Bella. Looking forward to what happens next...

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  39. *skidding back in front of the comment section after YouTube-ing the Nine Inch Nails song*

    I can see why this Edward makes you think of this song. Should be the story's theme song. Or his theme song at least.

    Can't imagine a mom leaving her kid. No wonder Edward is as messed up as he is.

    Awesome chapter. Enjoyed reading it and ready to read more!

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  40. Doofy and the word 'joyous'... Hihihi, it made me smile.

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  41. view from the hotel sounds awesome.... Bella seems to understand what Edward needs and why he needs it... he had shit for parents....

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  42. Well I say he gets a Scooby Snack for remembering how she liked the the Eiffel Tower—good move, boy!

    Now...don’t mess this up, Doofie! ;-)

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  43. I love this story. Just keeps getting better and better. Poor Edward he has no clue what to do. I am so looking forward for the next chapter.

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  44. She's so young, and hasn't even finished high school, right? How the hell is this going to work, even if they lie and say he saved her? Im dying to see how this all works out.

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  45. They are in Paris one of the most romantic places in the world. Edward did good and choose a really great hotel. Now... it's time for him to give her the honeymoon night she deserves and that he wants so much to give her.

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  46. Those "twitter people" should keep encouraging you, because I loved it. The hotel room is perfect. What could be a better location for a "wedding night" than that hotel with a perfect view of the Eiffel Tower. And Edward? There are a lot of things he never thought about doing until Bella. And I know that for her he can make love, just for her.

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  47. Oh Savage i love Bella leading him......He is so lost.. I am impressed that Bella realized that b4 him.

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  48. Oh Doofus. He thinks he needs a physical....lol bb. It's called love!

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  49. oh ed... i wonder who is after them and if they will every be safe... can't wait for more...

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  50. awww that was soooo goooood are we gonna get a little somethin somethin with e&b in the next chapter or what?!!! i'm frickin hangin out here getting all flustered and hot and panting!!!lol! surely it's the next chapter right?!!!

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  51. Well even though Edward is a duffass...lol...ya gotta feel sorry for him...poor thing...what a way to have to grow up...no love for him....so sad!

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  52. when are you updating?!?!?!? i being checking this blog like every hr lol

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  53. I just love this story... Thanks so much for sharing this with us; love u bb :)

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  54. poor e. no one understood the crappy life he had growing up, and now the only person who does is his ex-slave. b sees more to him then anyone ever has including himself.

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  55. Damn! It's kind of sad to see that Edward always thought himself so unlovable and unworthy. He can't even blame his parents for being so neglectful. And he's so confused by every single gesture of affection that Bella makes towards him, because no one has ever showed him love before. That's why he never sought love, and that's why no one stayed with him. I think that, considering his past, it is a miracle that he fell for Bella, finding love when he didn't even know he needed it, and it is even more miraculous that she cares about him, given what she had to endure because of him.

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  56. Of course you realy want it.. it is just that you REALLY don't know what it is you want...
    but Bella does and she is a good guide to follow... if only you are smart enough to do that.. sigh. Are you smart enough Doofus ?

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  57.  by now u wud tink i kno wat 2 expect concernin Eddie's fcuked up downbringing but it catches me off guard evry single time. Bella gets him so well, its a shame!!!!! How messed up cud b dat the ONLY person who sees u is the person whose life u literally destroyed for ur own selfish, personal gain?!?! Nw dats MESSED DA HELL UP!!!!!!!!!!

    Wat Eddie needz 2 do now is see himself. Bells already gets him but b4 anyting can pop off, like really pop off...........he need 2 admit 2 himself that he is capable of gud tings. i dont tink he quite gets that given that all gud tings, or tings that shudve been gud, in his life walked away from him. GO ON BELLA, SAVE OUR EDWARD!!!!!

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  58. Thinking of your mother at a time like that o.0 > Mood killer < ^_^ I was one of the tweeps that helped with the 'Landmark' situation. Don't you just hate it when you know what you want to say the 'word' just leaves your head completely?

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  59. hello? are you there? are you ok???
    we're all so used to you being dependable and posting regularly...it's been 2 or more weeks and i'm thinking maybe aliens kidnapped you????
    hope your rl isn't beating you up! you're a 'breath of fresh...weird...kinky...wild...wonderful air! 

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  60.  Ummm...we're up to chapter 91... :)

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  61.  Gosh, I'm so conflicted with these two! haha

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  62. I really want to be mad with him for what he did but I also think that Bella is right.  The fact that he doesn't see that what his parents did was wrong shows how off his perception of right and wrong are!!

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  63. It is amazing to me how kids will justify their parents actions and find normalcy in it or worse blame themselves.

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  64. This is an amazing story, loving the updates. Could it be the FBI following them, Bellas parents haven't stopped looking for her after all. Maybe the FBI were trying to 'trap' him in a deal and having seen Bella are now after her, thinking Edward has kidnapped her!

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  65. I think Edward is too messed up right now to be in a relationship with Bella. Also bells should not entertain anything serious with the man who bought her. With that said, I just love the tenderness between them. They shouldn't care for each other but they just do. The real test will be when E frees B officially, and would Bella seek him out.  

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  66. Bella wants Edward, Edward wants Bella, he thinks anyway! I can't remember, have they actually had sex together yet? I'm reading to many stories right now. LOL! I need to go back to the beginning and check that out! I think this Lee guy will show up and cause some problems coming up soon! Thanks for the update! I love reading this story!

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  67. everlastingdaydreamsJuly 25, 2011 at 8:04 AM

    <3 That song, and <3 this story!

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  68. love this story please continue to update Thanks :)

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  69. Does anyone know if you can get story alerts for CBWR?

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  70. You realize it's done, right? :)  Just go to the next page...

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  71. Kissing is such an addictive activity. It releases Oxytocin, a hormone that makes you feel good  and helps you fall in love

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  72. Its funny that ed keeps thinking that he needs to go to the Dr all the time. So dumb and so adorkable

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